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  The name that I tend to use to identify myself pagan circles and situations is Gwynarion Elessacar (or just Gwynn), and I have been a pagan now for some ten to eleven years. I was raised in the Roman (Latinate) Catholic faith of my parents but had become dissatisfied with it by the time I was twelve or thirteen years old. I spent several years believing in little or nothing, hardly ever thinking about religion at all, until I gradually began to grow in an awareness that there was something other and older out there. Old things appealed to me since I had been interested in dinosaurs and history from an early age. I started trying to find out more about the time I entered high school and fell quickly in love with it. Like many people today, my first experiences with paganism were through the writings of such authors as Scott Cunningham and D.J. Conway. At first I thought that I was a Wiccan, but that lasted only as long as it took me to really start learning a bit more about Wicca. The reason for this was three-fold. First, I knew only one other pagan at this time and he was learning it all just as I was. Second, after having thrown off the yoke of Catholicism I was distinctly unwilling to become a part of another organized religion (though I now see that Wicca is not as organized as I had thought it was). Third, Wicca itself did not contain many elements to interest or inspire me.
My heritage is mostly English/Irish/Welsh and that is where I was next lead. Armed with a number of books on the Celts and several on their religion and "spells" I set out to learn if this would work for me. I read everything from Celtic Magic by D.J. Conway, to the Mabingon, to Europe by Norman Davies. This broader and more informed approach was more appealing to me than Wicca had been. The goddess who I feel the strongest attraction to is the Morrighan (more information about her elsewhere on the site). Of late I have been spending a great deal of time looking into a path known as Celtic Reconstructionism or Celtic Restorationism. When I have some time I'll write down a little bit more about this path, what it entails, and what it means to me. But for now I will just say that it strongly appeals to the very methodical and factual portions of my nature, as well as my love for history and anthropology.
My path took one more major step forward thanks to the writings of the science fiction author Robert A. Heinlein. Through his book Stranger In A Strange Land (an excellent story, though not my favourite of his books), I discovered the religious philosophy of pantheism, and found the final piece of what I had been searching for. Every pantheist whom I have ever spoken too seems to feel differently about what it all means to them, so after careful reading and collection of information I have written down what pantheism means to me (contained elsewhere on this site).
For several years around the turn of the millenium I indulged in a great deal of discussion and debate with people representing a broad spectrum of faiths and beliefs. Of late my religious development has been of a more introspective nature, though. I have not been as active in debate as I would prefer, but a number of other large changes in my life have been keeping me busy. I think that this is just the natural swing of the pendulum, though, and I feel sure that my focus will once again turn outwards given time.
For more general information about me and my family I invite you to visit my secular personal site.
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